Going Doughnuts with Shivani
Itsy bitsy teeny weeny yellow polka dot Shivani.
London is suffering from a doughnut drought.
What did Mung and Shivanit get up to on Friday?
- Roamed the streets
- Drank apple juice from a carton left unattended
- Shoved baked potatoes down their throats
- Complained about being fat.
Sugar and Spice and All Things Ice
Mung's advice to everyone: Don't eat yellow snow.
And dont eat the kebabs in Russell Sq, they're nasty.
Heaven Knows Mung's Miserable Now
Mung was happy in the haze of a drunken hour.
But heaven knows Mung's miserable no-ow.
Things to be :( about :
- It's cold, cold, cold.
- Mung's getting old, old, old.
- She lives in the ghetto, ghetto, ghetto.
- Naughty peptides are not behaving and are ruining poor Mung's life.
In Mung's life,
Oh, why does she give valuable time,
To peptides that don't care if she lives or die ?
Shivani Dunks the Doughnuts
Shivani is camera-shy innit.
Doughnuts always remind Mung of her friend, Shivani. Back in the day, the fried dough pastry was fat pubescent Shivani's downfall, her evil calorie-infested arch-enemy, as well as her all-time favourite snack. No circle is seen without a hole and no Shivani was seen without a doughnut. Now the duckling has become a swan but the swan is still never seen without a doughnut in hand.
Mung walks down memory lane and remembers the 21st birthday gift from Shivani- a box of 10 strawberry jam doughnuts (Sainsbury's 99p)... of which Mung had 4 and Shivani had 6.
Valentine's Day
Kisses for my HPLC machine
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Oh Mung on the Day of Love,
What did you get up to?
Mung spent Valentine's day with her lean, mean, *HPLC machine.
*HPLC = High Performance Liquid Chromotography
Mung Sleeps With the Enemy
Sweet dreams with Westlife.
In the cold, cold winter nights, Mung has five young Irish men to keep her warm under the covers. Or in other words, shameless Mung shamelessly sleeps under the duvet-cover of shame.
The absolute truth is that the duvet-cover was given to me as a present, in no way did I buy it from Argos/order it online from Argos (yeah Mungers).
Mung has been enlisted as a candidate for the Nobel Prize of Shame.
Goodbye Birthmark, Hello Sandals.
Ha ha! You've got me in stitches!
Short-sighted Tom has made long-term plans by braving it through cosmetic surgery on his right foot. The stitches have been removed and we are all waiting impatiently for his little ribosomes to synthesise new skin protein to heal the wound.
Hooray for Tom! Whilst Tom limps and hobbles around the streets of London, Mung will list a few 'foot' puns to celebrate his new beautiful body part.
- 'Footylicious'
- 'Footen Tag! Ich habe ein schon Fuß!
- '1 foot= 12 inches of beauty.'
- 'Thank f*ot it's Friday'.
Jack and the Mungbean Stalk
Mungbean, Mungbean,
Give me an answer to,
I'm half crazy, I'm so in love with you.
It wont be a stylish marriage,
I cant afford a carriage.
But you'll look sweet,
Upon a seat,
Of a bicycle made for two innit.
You're Toxic I'm Slippin' Under
Ninhydrin
Mung loves the smell of:
- Fresh daisies
- Spring time
- Febreeze
- And the toxic chemical, Ninhydrin.
